Confessions of a Night Doula: The Sleep Myths Parents Believe (But Shouldn’t!)

As a night doula and sleep consultant, I’ve worked with countless exhausted parents trying everything to get their baby to sleep. Over the years, I’ve heard all kinds of sleep advice—some helpful, some… not so much. Let’s bust some of the biggest baby sleep myths that might be keeping your little one (and you) up at night.

Myth #1: “Keeping Baby Awake Longer Will Help Them Sleep Through the Night”

❌ Truth: Overtired babies actually sleep worse! When babies stay up too long, their bodies release stress hormones (like cortisol), making it harder to fall asleep and stay asleep.

✅ What Works Instead: Follow age-appropriate wake windows and aim for an early bedtime to prevent overtiredness.

Myth #2: “A Later Bedtime Means a Later Wake-Up Time”

❌ Truth: Many parents try pushing bedtime later, only to find their baby still wakes up at 5 AM (and crankier than ever). Babies often wake earlier when they’re overtired.

✅ What Works Instead: Stick to an earlier, consistent bedtime—most babies do best going to sleep between 6:30-8:00 PM.

Myth #3: “Babies Will Just ‘Figure Out’ Sleep On Their Own”

❌ Truth: While some babies are naturally good sleepers, most need gentle guidance to develop healthy sleep habits. Waiting for sleep to “just happen” can lead to months (or years!) of exhaustion.

✅ What Works Instead: Teaching good sleep habits—like a consistent bedtime routine and independent sleep skills—helps babies sleep longer and more peacefully.

Myth #4: “If My Baby Wakes Up at Night, They Must Be Hungry”

❌ Truth: While newborns need frequent feedings, older babies don’t always wake because they’re hungry. Sometimes, they wake out of habit or for comfort.

✅ What Works Instead: If your baby is over 6 months and getting enough daytime calories, try responding in other ways before offering a feeding. Gradually reducing night feeds can encourage longer sleep stretches.

Myth #5: “Sleep Training is Cruel”

❌ Truth: Sleep training does not mean leaving your baby to cry alone for hours. There are many gentle, responsive methods that help babies learn to sleep independently while still feeling comforted.

✅ What Works Instead: Choose a method that aligns with your parenting style—whether it’s a gradual approach (like “stay and support”) or a structured plan (like the Ferber method).

Myth #6: “My Baby Will Never Sleep Well”

❌ Truth: ALL babies can improve their sleep with the right approach. While some take longer to adjust than others, no baby is destined to be a “bad sleeper” forever.

✅ What Works Instead: Identify the root cause of sleep struggles (overtiredness, sleep associations, hunger, discomfort) and make small, consistent changes to help your baby sleep better. Even the most sensitive sleepers can improve with time, patience, and the right strategies.

Final Thoughts: What Parents Should Remember About Baby Sleep

There’s a lot of conflicting sleep advice out there, and it’s easy to get overwhelmed. The truth? Every baby is different, and no single approach works for every family. But by focusing on healthy sleep habits, realistic expectations, and a method that feels right for you, your baby can learn to sleep better—and you can finally get some rest too!

Still struggling with sleep? You’re not alone! If you’re looking for personalized support, let’s chat about how we can create a plan that works for your baby and your family.